Great Sex Secrets

Posts Tagged ‘Condom

Silicone blends vary in their density — some are very soft while others are more rigid. Silicone and blends are generally pliable. The variation depends on how much silicone is poured into the mold. Pure silicone toys are non-porous, but when silicone is only one of many ingredients, you should treat them like jelly rubber toys.
The benefit of having a silicone mix is that the material will last longer, and be less likely to break down or tear.

They may contain rubber softeners such as phthalates. Use with condoms for safety and to aid in cleanup.
Do not use silicone lube with silicone/rubber mix toys as it can melt the toy. Be sure to use a condom over the toy if you want to use silicone lube.

Siligel- a Doc Johnson creation that impreginates small amounts of antibiotic along with the silicone material to decrease the infection potential, much like many countertops these days.

Lube: Use only water-based lubes

Cleaning:.  For more delicate polymers or blends, or if you are not sure what the toy material is… stick to warm water and toy cleaner. Wash before and after use with toy cleaner to prevent contamination and maintain PH balance. rinse with warm water and air or pat dry.

Storage:  When dry, store in individual plastic bags for best results. Remove batteries before storage.

Latex is very porous and does not contain phthalates.

However, keep in mind that there are many people who are sensitive to Latex. So it is important to be aware of which materials could contain latex. Passion Parties does not carry any toys made from latex, but you can find some out there.

Condoms are usually made with latex. They are very durable and can fit over massager heads, dildoes, items shared between multiple partners and any item used anally. Latex dams can also be used to cover surfaces while still transmitting temperature and sensations.

If you are sensitive to latex, polyurethane condoms are also available.

Lube: Use only water-based lubes with rubber or latex, as oil/petroleum -based substances will break it down and destroy latex! That means oil-based lubricants, massage oils, butter, olive oil…anything containing oil. Silicone Lubricants with caution.

Cleaning:.  Wash before and after use with toy cleaner, rinse with warm water and air or pat dry. Because latex is so porous, it is more difficult to clean. Use with condoms for easier clean up. If your toy is waterproof, check to make sure there’s a tight seal around the battery compartment before immersing. After immersing, air dry the battery area. If your toy is not waterproof, use the spritz and rinse method.

Storage:  When dry, store in individual plastic bags for best results. Remove batteries before storage.

Latex Condoms

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Coloured condoms

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First of all, anal is not for everyone. It looks like ¼ to 1/3 of us are probably enjoying and engaging in occasional to more often anal play or intercourse, regardless of what our sexual orientation is. So lots of us are experimenting. So in case you are wondering why I have been spending so much time on this topic, I want you to be as safe as possible, have as much info as you want and decide what makes sense for you. But no matter what, knowledge is power! But (fetish aside) actual anal intercourse (penis in anus) is probably the least practiced method of back door fun.

So how do we get on with enjoying the anal playground?

Here are some of the secrets, if you want to give it a try there are several things to know and prepare.

1.    you need lots of lubrication

2.   penetration is optional

3.   relaxation is key

4.   action should be slow

5.   pain means stop

6.   safety is sexy

7.   condoms are cool


Image via Wikipedia

Foreplay= stimulation for pleasure

Sex= penetration

From a health perspective, there are a few things you need to prepare before knocking on the back door at all.

1.    Cleanliness

a.   Area must be clean – women should always wash from front to back away from the vaginal area, then pat dry. Bacteria thrives on warm wet place so don’t give them the chance.

b.   Clear the canal depending on how far you want to go

c.   Some people like to use a cleansing douche – that is optional. For some this spoils the fun because they are looking to be a little dirty.

2.   Condoms

a.   Can help prevent the rectal tissue from tearing

b.   It makes entry much more comfortable since the tissue is naturally dry and sensitive

c.   Condoms Hold lube better

d.   They can help prevent disease – not just herpes or HIV, but cross contamination.

3.   Lube Lube Lube

a.   No much is too much is the rule with lube

b.   Thicker water based products seem to work best.

c.    We also have a silicone lube that some people just love called Slip n Slide. It is not to be used with latex condoms, so you would have to get an alternative. The feel of silicone lube is velvety soft, and it lasts for a long long time, but clean up is a little more work, as it should be washed with soap and water afterward.

So what is it that makes Anal play so pleasurable?

There are lots of nerve endings… The clitoris has about the same number of nerve endings as the anus. It is all about allowing yourself to relax so you can feel good

Communication is the most important tool you have. It is hard to talk about your fantasies, especially if they involve a sneak attack to the back door. So how do you ask to explore?  Here are some tips to help you bring this up.

Guys,  Reassure your partner. Do your homework. Be safe. Have fun and relax and above all, let her know she can trust you. And since the anus is highly sensitive, it can double her pleasure!

Ladies, how do you bring this out without making your partner feel uncomfortable?  Remind him, it is not a gay or straight thing. There are as many nerve endings in the anus as there are in the clitoris. Why would he want to miss out on that much pleasure. It is also the pathway to the male g-spot or A spot a/k/a the prostate and it is a major pleasure zone for many guys.

Illustration of anal sex.

Image via Wikipedia

So your partner said yes, now what do you do????

Your home work of course! You have already talked about it, so you have an idea what is ok and not ok. But here are some ideas…

Anal intercourse is the least frequently practiced form of anal sex, so don’t start there…

The most common techniques include

  • Touching or massaging the anal opening
  • touching the anal opening with a finger while masturbating
  • touching a partner’s anus during oral sex
  • stimulating a partner’s anus during intercourse
  • inserting a lubricated and condomed finger inserted into the anal opening and gently rotate
  • insertion of a lubricated dildo or vibrator beyond the anal opening and short anal canal into the larger rectum. Many men, including heterosexuals, favor this form of penetration because it stimulates the A-spot, male G-spot or prostate.

Lets review a few important points about back door play again….

  • talk about it a lot before you try it
  • Let the receiver dictate the action and intensity
  • experiment slowly with fingers and small toys
  • remember lots and lots of lube!!!
  • Don’t be pushy unless you are asked for it
  • Don’t be disappointed if the first few times it doesn’t end up in the end the way you wanted it…good connections take time to develop
  • Don’t give up – it takes time to build up trust
  • Be gentle and supportive.
  • Learn to relax and enjoy Relaxation – mentally, emotionally and physically will allow more pleasure to flow to all areas including the anal area. Go slow, take deep breaths and allow your body to relax and warm up.

Finger binary

Image via Wikipedia

Start with cunnilingus…and a finger

The very very best way to go about anal – if you decide it is something you even want to try – is to begin orally with the clitoris. For women, anal stimulation during oral can give twice the sensation since twice the nerve endings are involved.

Guys tip, always be sure your nails are trimmed and filed. Of course you will want to both be relaxed. Place a condom over your finger and lube both the condom and the anus.

While orally stimulating the clitoris, gently start around the edges of the anus…where a lot of those nerve endings are. Many women will find this the mother lode of pleasure. Make a small O around the edges, no insertion, use firm pressure. This is a tease. Make it last as long as you can until she makes the first move.

Let it be her decision if there is to be any insertion…but for women most of the foreplay is building the anticipation. If there is any insertion, she will decide how deep how far, how fast and how long.  The key is to build anticipation and let her set the pace and the path.

Ancient Roman oil lamp depicting doggy style p...

Image via Wikipedia

Anal Intercourse
Many men and women are curious about anal sex but are scared about comfort and safety issues. If you are curious, start slow and work toward the most satisfying ending you can. And of course all the previous rules of safety apply. Relax, communicate, lubricate, condom.

The rectum is not straight like the vagina. After entering the anus there is a short anal canal which connects the anus to the rectum.  The rectum tilts toward the front of the body for a few inches, then it curves back sharply — sometimes as much as 90 degrees. After a few more inches, it turns back toward the front of the body again.

A person can learn about the shape of his or her rectum by gently inserting a soft object, trying different angles and body positions and concentrating on how it feels. Make sure the object has a flared base so that if you lose your grip, it won’t slip into the rectum and become irretrievable.  I am sure you have heard those stories from friends who work in hospitals. As a retired nurse, I can tell you that most of them are true…so don’t be one of those statistics!

Position for Pleasure

• Try a variety of Positions for anal intercourse to see what suits you best.

• Side by side or spooning is often best for beginners. It Gives receiver the most control over penetration.

• Missionary man on top face to face Provides for more intimacy and easier communication for some.

• Rear entry or doggy style allows for deepest penetration. The anus is the most exposed, often making thrusting easier.

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Darlene The Party Lady Is a Passion Parties Independent Consultant, Romance Ehnancement Specialist, Author, Trainer and Sex-EduTainer!

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